Growing Up In A Cult

Growing up, I thought my family was about as perfect as any family. My family was Evangelical Christian, my dad was in full time ministry, and our family had a great time ministering to others. That is, until I turned ten.

I was home schooled all through my school years. My dad had a degree in teaching, and we moved a lot as God would move us to different ministries. However, when I turned ten our family joined a home school group that was supposedly based on the bible, and therefore superior to any other curriculum. In the beginning none of us really saw anything wrong with it. We went to the yearly conventions, and got fired up with the ideas of this new way of life. The program encouraged family harmony, and taught biblical principles, and character qualities. None of us saw what was coming.

Right after I turned fifteen, my family felt called of God to join this home school group, in their full time ministry. We sold most of our stuff, and moved to Indianapolis, thrilled to be a part of making history in the Christian community. Our family moved into two hotel rooms at the Center, and plunged right into their ministry work. My parents were in charge of an eight-week course teaching collage age kids how to work with juvenile delinquents. My older sister decided to go through their program, while I volunteered to work in their laundry room. Their ministry was fast paced, and they would often host seminars that would max out the building with seven hundred people. Our family rarely got to see each other during the three years we worked there, as we all were working in different departments through out the day.

It wasn’t until after we moved away, and several years had passed that we began to realize the depth of what we had become involved in. In Evangelical Christianity we believe that Jesus loves us, that our sin nature will cause us to go to hell, but that Jesus came to save us from ourselves. In trusting in him we chose to follow him, with the knowledge that he will lead us, and that his sacrifice in dying for us enables us to go to heaven after we die. What my family didn’t realize at the time, was that the organization that we were apart of taught that while you would still go to heaven, you had to live a certain life, and do all the right things, or else God wouldn’t love you. Women had to wear skirts; guys and girls should never talk to each other to keep from sinning. To think about the opposite sex was wrong, as you should be focused on ministry. Your parents were responsible to find the right spouse for you, and of coarse you would fall in love with the person they picked. You had to talk a certain way, walk right, sit right, think right. The rules just went on, and on, and as time passed the rules became more restricting. It was no longer the relationship with Jesus Christ that mattered. You had to follow their list of rules, and chose the highest standard, or God wouldn’t love you, and your family would have to kick you out of the family.

How sad I am to look back and realize how much of my time, and energy I put into this group. It has been a miracle that our family was able to come out of this ministry, and still get along. So many of my friends experienced the most extreme rejection from their families when they chose to follow Jesus, instead of a list of rules. The pain of what happened will remain with us for the rest of our lives, but at least we now know that Jesus is loving, that we can live in his grace, and that he will forgive us when we do something wrong. While I didn’t have anything close to normal teen years, I have learned more about Christianity than most people learn in a lifetime. I can only hope that what I had to go through will enable me to help others from walking down that same path. It isn’t about the rules; Christianity is about loving, and following Jesus, and having a deep relationship with him.