Raising a child can be difficult especially if one is a single parent. But add to the mix a child diagnosed at 4 years of age with Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) and you have an overwhelming task. While there are a lot of children misdiagnosed with ADD (Attention Deficit Disorder) and ADHD there are millions of children who truly suffer with these disorders.

More is known today than 18 years ago and when my son was diagnosed the first thing done was to prescribe Ritalin. I worked closely with his doctor to ensure he was not being overly or under medicated. He was in counseling to help him learn to make the best choices possible and not let the disorder rule him.

There were many days and nights I felt completely and utterly overwhelmed. It was living on a roller coaster most of the time. With ADD and ADHD even fun activities such as going to an amusement park, swimming, birthday parties, family get-to-gethers are stressors that impact the child. Too much stress of any kind and you have a situation on your hands that to an outsider merely looks like bad behavior on the part of the child. In reality, children with these disorders are not able to handle the stress regardless of the source of the stress.

I found that keeping my son on a very strict schedule worked extremely well. He required a lot more structure for his life than a child without the disorder. Strict structuring of his day kept him focused and able to finish tasks and activities.

When it came time for my son to go to school I really became educated on the difficulties of trying to teach these children. Fact is most teachers have not been properly trained on "how" to teach these children and keep the child actively engaged in the classroom and working well with other children. Most school systems honestly do not have the budget and children who are outside the "norm" fall through the cracks. Additionally, children with ADD and ADHD get labeled as "bad kids". Most of the time this is not true but there are exceptions to the rule of course. My son was able to have a successful Kindergarten and First Grade year due to the well trained teachers at those two schools. However, once he got into the Second Grade everything changed. The teachers had too many students and not enough training with ADD and ADHD students. I worked very closely with teachers, principals and school counselors but by the end of the Third Grade enough was enough and the decision to home school was made. After one year of homeschooling we tried the public school system again. He struggled but did rather well and so we tried Sixth Grade. This was a disaster! I was at the school more than I was at work and by the end of the year he hated school. I felt so badly because he had always loved learning new things and now he no longer was excited about the subjects he did enjoy. Finally, we went back to home schooling for the 7th & 8th grade years and enjoyed some successes in reviving the "wanting to learn" part of him. His high school years were difficult but by the time he was in high school we had learned what worked for him and what did not when it came to teaching.

He has been out of school now for a couple of years and hoped as he grew and matured into a young adult the ADHD would lessen. It has not. My son will always have to deal with the disorder but he has learned what triggers his ADHD and what he can do to "get himself" calmed down.

I know I am not the only parent to live with an ADHD child. I know it wears you out emotionally and physically. People who do not have children with these disorders really cannot understand and truly empathize with us as parents and educators. More is known today and there are more treatments available other than Ritalin.

In the small town were we lived there were no support groups and the Internet community was not available. If you have a child or children with these disorders today you do not have to go through it alone. Contact a local support chapter and get involved. If there is not a local support group search the Internet and get involved in that Internet community. You will be so glad you did!